Ignorance Is (not aways) Bliss
In the long term I would feel better if someone told me a home truth, that hurts, rather than being left in the dark. It gives me the opportunity to recognize it and the option to change it.
In most cases, for honest communication, the truth is best known. However there are some cases where we need to use discretion. Just because it is the truth does not mean it needs to always be expressed. White lies can only have a purpose, if used with discretion and for compassionate reasons. (That’s why they are called ‘white’.) A ‘…bandage for the soul…’, as Katherine Kerr called it, in her book ‘Dragonspell’.
There is a big difference between telling someone the truth in an appropriate manner and/or advertising it to other people, for point scoring, patronizing or ego reasons. I suggest you question your motives if you have to out-the-truth to anybody other than the person that it refers too.
I saw a sign once that said,
If you like our service, tell everybody. If you do not like our service, tell us!!!
It makes the good point, because they are the only ones who can change their service. If you tell others without telling them, you change nothing.
The same principle can be applied to ‘telling people truths’. If you must comment about somebody, it changes nothing if you tell others, but finding a way to tell them, gives them the chance to make change. (…or a chance to tell you where to go….)
Alan Friday
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